Help
I am pretty much always convinced that I am inadequate. That what I’m doing isn’t enough. That if I were only better, I could relax. That I’m at least partly at fault all of the time.
It can start to wear on you.
But this morning I started to really think about it, think about what exactly it was that I was disappointed in myself for doing (or not doing), and what some of those things really meant.
Just because I can’t fit an unreasonable number of things into my day doesn’t mean I’m a failure because I can’t do everything on my own.Â
Just because I need white noise at work to block out loud conversations today doesn’t mean I’m a failure because I can’t concentrate on my own.Â
Just because I need a trainer running my workouts doesn’t mean I’m a failure because I can’t push myself enough on my own.
Just because I need to go to Weight Watchers doesn’t mean I’m a failure because I can’t eat properly like I know I need to on my own.
Hmm. So… I guess….
Just because I need help doesn’t make me a failure.Â
When I boil it down like that, it makes it seem a lot more obvious all of a sudden.
Yes, yes, yes!
This might seem a bit silly, I guess, but I’ve started making two lists side by side: a to-do list, but then a DONE list of the things I’ve actually accomplished.
Even when not everything gets checked off the first list, it’s still kind of heartening to look at the second list and notice how much I DID do.
Oh, yes. The inner critic. Mine is a big you-know-what. I can relate to your first example. I am crazy for to-do lists, but I always make them too long, which leaves me feeling like I didn’t do enough.